The Greasiest of Greasy Spoons
Times are tough. The fat must be trimmed. But what if you want to have your fat and eat it too? Then head to Bon’s Off Broadway, the greasiest of greasy spoon diners.
Bon’s is the kind of place where you are not sure if you should sit down on the grimy, ripped plastic booth. You are somewhat sure that you don’t want to use the bathroom there. And you are positively sure that you are going to get the biggest, cheapest, most satisfying greasy spoon breakfast that there is to be had in all of Vancouver.
Bon’s is not exactly a hidden neighbourhood gem. The diner has been around for awhile and it’s well known as a good place to nurse a hangover. On a Saturday or Sunday morning, you’ll need to get there pretty early or pretty late unless you want to wait 15-30 minutes for a table, which can be painful when you are hungover.
If you do have to wait, at least there is plenty to look at. The swirly yellow walls are covered in movie posters, skateboard company advertisements, graffiti, and the odd album poster/affirmation:
Once you get a seat, you’ll find that graffiti of the bathroom stall style decorates each booth:
The whole place feels sort of mismatched. Clearly, they are here to feed you; not to make the place look pretty. Don’t examine the ketchup bottle on the table: it looks like it has been refilled 20 times without a single soapy intervention. The salt and pepper shakers aren’t from the same set. And the sugar dispenser is actually a broken syrup container. The creamers have been out all morning and have lost their chill. You just hope they haven’t been out all night. The table wasn’t wiped properly before you sat down.
Okay, so this description makes Bon’s sound like a little shop of diner horror. It isn’t. The waitresses are never rude, even though they are swamped and probably not making big tips off the $2.95 breakfasts. What was that, you say? That’s right, Bon’s offers a $2.95 Breakfast Special that comes with two eggs, two slices of toast, home fries, and your choice of bacon, sausage, or ham.
The breakfast was amazing. When I ordered over-medium eggs, I actually got over-medium eggs. The toast was still warm when it landed on my table. The home fries were soft in the middle and crispy on the outside. The ham—my favourite meat option—was a hefty slab of porky goodness. On other occasions, I have also tried the hot cakes, which are delicious. While Bon’s isn’t technically a “breakfast place,” the morning meals are so good that I’ve never been able to venture far from the Breakfast Special. If you have never been to Bon’s before, why not celebrate your next hangover with a trip off broadway?
Bon’s Off Broadway
2451 Nanaimo Street
Vancouver, BC V5N 5E5