“Anyone Can Do It” (Alone) Ribs
Tonight, I stayed in. As a surprise, I thought that I’d make “my” famous ribs for my friend who was coming over for the evening.
“My” ribs actually belong to my father-in-law, Charlie, who is the kind of cook I only wish I could be. For the longest time, he wouldn’t reveal how he made the ribs so that the meat fell off the bone. After enduring much pestering from me, he finally relented: “You boil them in tomato sauce, water, and garlic. Then let them marinate in BBQ sauce overnight.” Could it be that easy? Yes, it could.
So, are you thinking, “But I’m a disaster in the kitchen; I’ll never get it right!”? That’s okay! I’m a disaster in the kitchen too! I’ve been failing in the kitchen for years, but I keep at it.
So, this is how my night went with my attempt to make the “Anyone Can Do It” Ribs.
I texted my friend on the way home from work and told her how to get to my place by skytrain. I told her that anytime after 6:00 pm was fine and to just call me as she passed through Patterson station so that I would know it was time to hop in the car to pick her up from the station nearest my house.
I rushed to the store to grab tomato sauce, which I realized I had forgotten to ask my husband to do when he went on a Costco run.
As soon as I got home, I performed a quick clean of the bathroom (Windex makes everything look better!), spruced up the living room a bit, washed my hands, and set to work on the ribs.
I got my ingredients ready:
1-2 packages of pork back ribs (“side ribs” are NOT as good!)
1 big-ass bottle of quality BBQ sauce
3 big cans of tomato sauce
2-8 “skinned” whole garlic cloves
I began by removing the connective tissue on the “inside” of the racks of ribs. Now, this is an advanced move and don’t think you have to do this in order to make awesome ribs.
I loosened the tissue with a sharp knife by slipping it just under the tissue between each rib bone and then I pulled off the tissue. Note that this is easier to accomplish if you are wearing kitchen or latex gloves because bare hands + bare meat = slippery!). Removing the connective tissue prevents the ribs from “curling” as they heat in the oven or on the grill. I also feel that the ribs are a bit more tender without the tissue. However, I must be honest that this is quite a pain to do and it is optional. The ribs will still be delicious if you skip this step.
Use a sharp knife to loosen the connective tissue from the ribs and then pull off
Well, removing the tissue takes a long-ass time and by the time I was done it was almost 7:00 pm and I hadn’t heard from my friend at all. She never responded to my first text and I thought that was a bit weird, so I sent her another text asking if she’d received the first. Then I went back to work.
I rinsed the ribs and cut the racks into sections about 4-6 ribs long or whatever looked to be about one serving.
I filled a very large pot with three big cans of tomato sauce. Flavoured tomato sauces work well, although plain is fine too. I added about 6-8 cloves of garlic, the pieces of ribs, and water until the ribs were fully submerged.
Add three large cans of tomato sauce to a big pot
At this point, I checked my phone to see if I had received a text and, indeed, I had not. Hmm, I decided to check Facebook to see if perhaps she’d lost her phone. It seems like whenever someone loses their phone, the first thing they do is post a desperate status update on Facebook: “I’ve lost my phone! Send me your number!” I really expected to see something like this. Instead I found a Facebook message from my friend canceling our plans a mere 4 1/2 hours before we were to hang out. What?! I got Facebook canceled?!
Dejected, I continued making dinner, albeit without the enthusiasm that I had previously.
I put the pot on to boil for about 45 minutes. The wonderful thing about these ribs is how forgiving they are. Got wrapped up watching old episodes of Arrested Development? No problem. You can leave the ribs on to boil for up to an hour and half, although I do recommend that you stir them every once in a while to move them around a little.
After they were done boiling, I strained out the liquid with the lid of the pot and let them cool a bit. Then when they were no longer scalding hot, I patted them dry with a paper towel and coated them in BBQ sauce. Your ribs can only be as good as your BBQ sauce, so don’t skimp here. Normally, I recommend leaving them to marinate in the BBQ sauce overnight, but I was feeling impatient.
Fill a wide shallow bowl with BBQ sauce and dip each serving of ribs in to coat in sauce on both sides
I chose to bake them because I wasn’t ready to get the BBQ out of storage, but you can also wrap them in tin foil “packets” and put them on the BBQ. Additionally, you can put them in a crock pot with some extra BBQ sauce and take them to a potluck.
As it was just me, myself, and I, I put them on a tin-foil lined baking sheet (uncovered) and popped them in the oven at 375 degrees Fahrenheit for about 25 minutes, although this time is flexible too.
Place ribs on a baking sheet lined with tin foil
While they were baking, I cut up some red (skin on) potatoes and boiled them in salted water till soft. Once I could easily put a fork through the potatoes, I drained the water. I added about 1/2 cup of butter (cut into cubes), a splash of milk, a sprinkle of salt, and about a teaspoon of garlic powder. Then I mashed them with a hand masher just until the ingredients were blended. I heated up some corn with more glorious butter and a sprinkle of salt. By the time this was complete, the ribs were ready to come out of the oven.
After taking some final pictures of my delicious Dinner For One, I ate in the company of my own misery. I guess this is what I get for living out in deep southeast Burnaby: even my ribs aren’t enough of a selling point to get someone to make the journey out to my place.
Dinner For One
